urbanmomma

but i have pictures!

2006-10-02T09:50:00.000-07:00

Sorry it's been so long since the last update. I'm terrible, I know. But I have pictures!! *laugh* seriously, I have been updating the pictures, I'm hoping some of you noticed. Her birthday party pictures have been up since a few days after her party. I just didn't post on this. *smile*

And I really don't have too much to say this time. I've been super busy - I'm taking 4 online classes this semester trying to get a move-on with my degree. It's looking like December of 2007 is when I'll be able to graduate. *frown* But four classes is definately a push in the right direction.
I am still volunteering with Guardian Ad Litem (CASA), so that's keeping me busy as well.

Zoë is doing good! She FINALLY got her crib. I say finally, for those of you who don't know, because we went through two online companies and three cribs before we were finally able to put one together. Point being - it's up now. And she had no problems transitioning from her pack-n-play (the only thing she's ever slept in) to her crib. Even if it is ten times the size of her pack-n-play! *laugh* Other than that, she's working on building her food repitoire, she's working on communication skills with mommy and daddy, and she's apparently working on breaking MORE teeth! I don't know which teeth she could possibly be breaking now, she's already got all of her one-year molars, but I guess she'll just keep teething until she's done. *shrug* She's also really close to walking. She took two unassisted steps a few days ago (it was more like a "fall" towards the couch), but daddy is "still not satisfied". He wants to see her walking around all the time without holding on before he leaves. So we're working on it.

And that's about it. We seem to be very busy and trying to make time to slow down...*heh* Aren't we all?

Love and kisses to everyone.

birthday party drama

2006-08-13T09:39:00.000-07:00

the closer her birthday gets, the closer i get to running away, screaming. *haha*

seriously, a few weeks ago, i was the supermomma trying to make lists and buy things early. i got her presents, and that's it. everything else will, of course, be last minute.
this last minute business includes a change in venue, which happens to be on base, meaning get all the non-mililtary people a visitors pass for the day. *augh* alan is our godsend.

there's going to be a barbeque, which involves getting the food, the sides, the garnishes, the paper plates, napkins, trashbags, plasicware, cake, icecream?, oh! and don't forget to bake the cake!

and i've been spending days googling "eco-friendly birthday party" and "eco-healthy party ideas" just to figure out if there really are people out there who are brave enough to bring plastic plates and cloth napkins for that many people. honestly, i would love to...i really want to...but i don't even live in the town we're hosting this party in...like i told r - it would be a logistical, dishwashing nightmare. although i've seriously considered calling gail, who i *know* would be on my side about this...but she lost her cloth napkins and i only have four. *frown*

*sigh* the point of all this rambling: next year, zoë will get to pick her guests, her location, and her theme. i'm figuring, a two year old mind won't fathom thinking as big as this party is going to be...so i'll be in luck. *smile* and maybe she'll only pick four people, so i can use my cloth napkins...*grin*

on the upside: she's finally allowing us to help her learn how to walk. she gets very excited when she can take steps, although she purposely uses our hands as leaning tools. she leans so far forward it looks like she expects the air to hold her up! it's really funny, but at least she's getting practice moving her feet.
she's got about 10 teeth now. for the past few weeks, she's been on a teething kick. one tooth after another. and she hates my fingers in her mouth, so it's very difficult for me to check on them. but there are several she's trying to break still. and she's just learned how to bite. it came by way of her trying to find something to chew on, and finding daddy's toes first. then the next day she discovered mommy's kneecap. *ouch* she thinks it's funny, so we all have a quick laugh about it, but i've already started my "scolding"..."r, tell her 'ouch', don't let her bite you!" *haha*

she has also finally learned how to clap for herself. she used to grab our hands and show us how to clap, but she's discovered how to do this on her own. so when we see her we do the typical "yay!" and she laughs and grins and continues clapping. it's fun. now i've just gotta teach her how to play patty-cake. she already *loves* when i use her feet or hands to sing "the itsy-bitsy spider"...so we're on a roll...

but most of you will see this on saturday for her birthday party. can't wait to see everyone!

new pics to look at, too. *yay* (everyone clap their hands!)

the new ads.

2006-08-06T09:41:00.000-07:00

i know, i know...what is the world coming to when i add advertisements to my blog?!! seriously, though, for everytime you click on those links, i make money.

so do my the favor...it won't hurt you...go on! click on something. then come back here and click again! *smile*

thankyouverymuch.

we're still alive...

2006-08-01T14:30:00.000-07:00

and doing well, actually.

zoë is doing great. she'll be one in 17 days! *frown* i can't believe how time flies!! i think when she was only weeks old i knew i'd say that again.

she's working on breaking her 8th tooth. she's very close to walking...holding on to tables and couches, letting go and standing alone for a few seconds...but she refuses to walk while holding our hands. stubborn little thing. wonder who she gets that from? *smile*

robbie got a new job offer a few weeks ago. he's working on all the paperwork before he gets to start there, but they are looking forward to him just as much as he is looking forward to starting. so that's always a good sign. he's currently taking three classes online through devry university, and although he learns from the material, he's having difficulties with the financial aid office and has mentioned maybe choosing another school. he's making progress towards his degree, which is what is ultimately important.

i'm making progress as well, although i share in his grief of not being pleased with my school. both my financial aid office and my overall experience so far. i've also considered picking a new school, but i have yet to hear of an online school offering a BA in sociology. or any humanities degree, for that matter. if anyone knows of one - let me know!!!

i've been sworn in by the local judge to be a CASA volunteer but i haven't received a case yet. so i'm eagerly waiting for that...should be quite an experience.

let's see...at the end of may, we took a family trip to washington dc for memorial day weekend. we enjoyed the festivities there, and we spent that monday at arlington national cemetery under a shaded tree paying our respects to veterans.

in june we went down to florida to spend the weekend at robbie's dad's house for the ferriol family reunion - lots of fun! zoë and i met lots of family we'd never met before.

in july, my high school girlfriend got married - congratulations mr. and mrs. tran-ozuna! i was fortunate enough to be one of the witnesses at a very intimate beach wedding. this was on the fourth of july, so robbie, zoë, and i ended up just staying around the house. robbie and i snuck out to the porch when we started hearing fireworks at ten o'clock at night, just to say we did...*smile*

also, for the month of july (even though it was just this past weekend) robbie went on a camping trip with lots of old friends of his. it got cut short due to weather in clemson, sc, but the one night he did spend there sounds like it was lots of fun.
and while he went there, zoë and i went back to sumter to help out and celebrate with my friends tiffany and jeff who just had their second child; wesley paul was born on the 27th at 7lbs, 7ozs...congratulations to them...and to wesley's big sister lilly for being so brave! *smile*

and now we're planning zoë's first birthday party. it's going to be a great family reunion for both mine and robbie's families. we're both very excited to spend the day with family members we haven't seen in years. our extended families will finally get to meet each other, and many of them will get to meet zoë for the first time. nothing like a grandchild to bring the families together!

of course i'm sure the majority of you reading this are really here for the pictures, so...let the viewing commence! *smile* i've changed servers, yet again. google just seems to have the best of everything internet, so i switched to "picasa online" which is still being tested, but gets two thumbs up from me. the link is on the right...

to the ferriol's: i'm sorry these took me so long to post!! =)

home

2006-05-04T10:30:00.000-07:00

just when i was getting good at taking self-portraits of zoë and i, he makes it home! *heh*

he made it back "in one piece" like i requested...*hehe* safe and sound and fairly glad to be home. glad to see his beautiful daughter, that's for sure. of course they have to go through the initial comfort stage again, but they're both adapting very quickly and well.

the apartment is slowly being put together - the new television, the new couch, the new room for zoë! we're striving for it to all be cleaned and in order by the end of the week. *fingerscrossed*

robbie will be back to work this coming monday, and we'll be taking a road trip to clemson for uncle kendy's graduation soon...but other than that, we'll be sticking around here for a while...relaxing in "our home" has a nice ring to it.

easter went well! zoë and i went to auntie ashleigh's parents' house then to grandma gail's ("mumsy") house for the dinner and egg hunt. we won again! *hehe* papa skip always hides money in the eggs, and uncle kendy, uncle hayes, uncle justin, and zoë and i raced to find the most money. we found the fewest eggs, but the most money!! *woohoo* two years ago, robbie and i found the most, and now uncle kendy and uncle hayes want us to play "every person for himself"...sore losers. *laugh* it was a great time, though. the only thing is was missing was daddy. we were all wishing that robbie could have been there. next year though...it's on! *smile*
there are lots of cute pictures of this day posted on the picture blog. just fyi, you can order your own copies of the pictures through the dotphoto website. it's very easy and very cheap. sent right to your house, even. in case anyone was interested...

so...we're all living together again. our happy little family.
at least i don't have to take self-portraits anymore! *smile*

edit: there are two new folders on the photo blog. one is easter, the other is called "8 months" and it's pictures from this past weekend before robbie got home...zoë and i went to the botanical gardens during a festival to hang out.

slow down on the growing up!

2006-04-14T16:58:00.000-07:00

i take back everything i've said about being excited for her to grow up and change!!! *pout*

zoë is almost crawling...she gets into position, revs up her butt, and tries to take off...but she just can't figure out how to move her hands in sync with her legs! *laugh* too cute. but i don't want her to crawl!!! i want her to stay put. her mobility is my insanity!! seriously.

she had a head cold a few weeks back, her fever wasn't too high, but she had it for three days, so i took her in to see the doc. nothing serious, her fever broke the next day. but she was weighed while we were there...20 pounds, 8 ounces!! like i tell r - she's a heffer!
i just switched out her wardrobe to 12 months sizes, but even those only fit up to 22 pounds! she won't be able to wear them for very long...
and she'll only be 8 months old in 4 days!!! *eek*

easter is sunday. i wouldn't have even remembered except that skip made sure i cleared my schedule...gail will be in town along with kendy and hayes! (zoë's paternal grandmother and two uncles) so that's exciting. they haven't seen her since christmas. i'm sure they'll all be shocked at how much she's grown. and i'm really looking forward to getting recent pictures of all of them with her. i'm trying to keep up with that...
she's got the cutest easter dress. daddy got it for her for christmas and she has yet to find the occasion to wear it. *smile* white with pink and blue stripes...and i just got her a pink pail to match it for a "basket". not that she'll get too much "hunting" done, but i'm sure it will make for the cutest "my first easter" pictures. and i'm sure her uncles will have no qualms about helping her find all the eggs. *heh*

soooo. r comes home in about two weeks!!!!! *grin* can't you hear my excitement?!! i can't wait to see the look on his face when he hears her say "hiya dada" in person...(and of course i'm looking forward to seeing him myself! *smile*)

i'm still substitute teaching. still loving it...for the most part. if you haven't heard this before, lemme make it clear to you - substituting is more difficult than being the permanent teacher, and teaching is a very difficult job!! *sigh* but it has opened some doors for me, and i think i'm going to be pursuing a license to teach special education when i'm done with my degree. alas, i want to be a teacher. *heh*
speaking of degree...i just found out i was accepted to FSU. so i'll be a 'bronco' starting in august when i move in with r. *woohoo* and i was just advised yesterday - they'll be taking all of my credits!!! *yay* so it looks like i'll finally be joining the 'educated elite' in december of 2007. (roughly...sooner if i push it) but i'm excited. i'm ready to get that degree done and behind me. move on to better things. like more education! *heh* maybe grad school...the license to teach...more work, more work, more work.

alright. i've posted more pictures. just so everyone knows, when you look at the pictures on dotphoto, you can also order your own copies. have them sent to your house and everything. i know i just sent some out to family, but these are newer and much cuter. they're my favorites so far...
and the ones i take for easter will be added shortly too.

don't forget:
username: urbanmomma
password: zoesofia

work, school, sleep, repeat.

2006-03-26T12:41:00.000-08:00

she has four teeth now!! *eek*
she broke her top two front teeth on her 7 month birthday (march 18th). because of that, she has (thankfully) stopped drooling as much. still drool, obviously, but not 2 or 3 bibs worth! *laugh*

she's becoming more mobile everyday. she's not crawling yet, but she has learned how to go from sitting up to laying on her stomach. she'll simply reach for the toy of choice, then throw her legs out behind her. she gets very giddy from this! *so cute*

i'm convinced that she knows her daddy's voice. when he calls and she's awake, i put him on speakerphone and they chat it up. she's most talkative when she hears him on the other end of the phone. her face lights up, and as of a few days ago, daddy gets to hear a "hiya dada"! it's the best thing in the world for me, so i can imagine how his heart flutters. *smile* when he's not on the phone, she's learned how to say "dadadada" but never "dada" unless it's talking to him. and i've tried putting other people on the phone with her, and she doesn't have the same face-lighting reaction to it, so i'm convinced. we've got a smart cookie! and one that very much misses her daddy. she loves to watch him on tv, too. she'll sometimes fall asleep to the music he put on her dvd.
so now i'm pushing for the "mama" but...no expectations. just hopes. *smile*
i am thankful that she knows her daddy and will recognize him when he returns. so no complaints here. "dada" is fine for now. :)

she seems to like her daycare. she still isn't eating her bottles, but she'll eat jarfood while she's there, so that's something. every week i tell myself "this is the week she'll start eating". i even go early to the center and feed her breakfast while we're there, so she'll know that eating a bottle there is okay. i'm hoping that will eventually help. she likes the toddlers that share the room with her, and i think it's helped her adjust to the change. she's not too sure about other babies her age, but when a toddler comes over and says hi to her, she squeels with excitement. so at least she has that. and she seems to like her caretakers too. they love her, that's for sure!

i'm back in school now. taking one class at night. and i work pretty much everyday still. substitute teaching is requires lots of energy! *sigh* but it's very rewarding, so i don't mind it.
this semester ends at the end of april, which luckily enough is the same time robert comes home. so zoë and i will be spending the entire month of may here in NC!! *yay* we're planning to do a little light traveling. see some parts of the US that we haven't seen before. boston, maybe? *shrug* i'm just looking forward to all of us spending time together.

so that's it. work, school, and our 7 month old growing up WAY too fast. *laugh*
hope everyone is doing good...

another 2 months...

2006-03-12T14:12:00.001-08:00

it's been two months since my last post! sorry everyone. time slips away quickly...

zoë is doing great. she had a well baby checkup this past friday. officially: she weighs 19 pounds and 4 ounces and she's now 26 inches long! *eek* she's getting SO big. she wears bigger 6-9 months size clothes and smaller 9-12 months size. before long she'll be wearing toddler sizes! *laugh*
a friend of mine had a death in the family, so zoe wore a dress for the first time last week. pictures have been posted...she's cute as a button. but when isn't she? *smile*

she's teething like crazy right now, trying to break her top two teeth. i tell her all the time that she's a running faucet. she literally goes through 2 or 3 bibs a day!

she started daycare last week. my friend was watching her while i worked, but she's about 6 months pregnant now, so it was getting to be too much to watch zoë and her own 4 year old daughter. but the new daycare is quite nice (for a daycare). they are the only daycare in sumter county to have a national certification (the same kind that the base CDC is required to have) so that's always a plus. it's a small place...zoë is the 5th baby in the room, and they won't be getting anymore. only five they say. so i also like that. there are also toddlers in the room which makes zoë more comfortable because she was around lilly (the 4 year old) all the time. so...so far so good. and it's only for about 8 weeks anyway. when robbie gets back she'll be going to spend the summer with him in north carolina.

she's about to start crawling. anyday now, really. she can get herself up on hands and knees and rock back and forth. it's SO cute! *laugh* i put toys in front of her, just out of her reach, so she'll throw herself forward at them until she figures out how to move her limbs in unison. she's so funny. but she gets so excited when she figures out how to do something new. she's learning all sorts of noises with her mouth lately. her favorite, oddly enough my least favorite, is a shriek. she's just learned this one. if she's excited, mad, or just wants to get my attention, she'll shriek as loud as humanly possible. *ouch* but she can make other (cuter!) noises too. she smacks her tongue on the top of her mouth (it sounds like a kissing noise) so sometimes when i kiss her she'll copy me and smack her tongue. that's my favorite one. if we're alone, (when she's not shy) we'll have "smack conversations" which are always lots of fun...

she's learning all sorts of different things to do with her toys and her hands. i'm trying to teach her to put the rings on the stick, but so far she's only mastered taking them off. and she hates when they're on the stick! she'll turn the whole tower upside down to get them all off at once. and she'll dump her bucket of blocks out just to get them all out of the bucket, too. but she hasn't figured out how to put them back in. (or she just doesn't want to *shrug*) so playtime is getting more interesting everyday - for both of us! *laugh*

she eats lots of different babyfoods now. obviously fruits are her favorite, but she also likes the vegetables. she'll eat meat, too, but only if it's mixed with something that tastes better. *heh*

i'm only able to post pictures when i'm in north carolina (better computer) so i do as much as possible...sorry it takes me so long to update. i'll try to be better at it.

love you all.
now go check out the cute pictures!

remember:
username is "urbanmomma"
password is "zoesofia"

new magazine

2006-01-02T11:17:00.000-08:00

just a little side note...i "stumbled upon" (by way of gail - thanks gail!) this magazine called "brain, child"...it's a mommy mag, but on a totally different level than the others. anyway. i love it. i bought it. and i added their link to my page. so check 'em out...

here's a little something from the issue i've got:

"there once was a baby brand new
who awoke for a feeding at two.
mom left her warm bed
for the third time and said,
'how i wish that men lactated too!'"
~m.byerly, orange, ca

i also added a link to "daddy's blog", and a link to the mothers movement online. both very interesting...

happy 2006!

2006-01-02T10:20:00.000-08:00

look at me! i'm posting again before three more months pass us by...

speaking of three months...that's how long zoë's daddy with be away from us while he "visits" iraq. yep. he'll be leaving next week! *eek* so keep him in your thoughts for the next few months.

christmas and new years went well.
zoë broke her two front teeth right before christmas, and of course she now chews on everything she can get in her little fists...but it's helping her teeth come in and relieves her pain, if only for a brief moment, so i'm not complaining.

my grandma keyser was in town for a bit over christmas. her and zoë got along great! *smile* they just love each other to pieces...although i was greedy at times, i did my best to let them spend some QT together. and that they did.
we made time to get our "four generation" pictures taken at a studio (zoë, me, my mom, and her mom; aka grandma keyser)...thinking that 9am would be perfect since zoe is such a morning person. i didn't expect her to wake up at 7:30a and be ready for her first nap right when we got to the studio!! so those pictures didn't turn out nearly as well as we had all hoped. we got a few cute ones, but they seemed cute only by comparing them to the ones where zoë was actually wailing! *laugh* alright, it wasn't that bad...but i was really upset about it. i wanted to cry. studio pictures are once-in-a-lifetime chances...but my lesson is learned. plan better for her naptimes! plus it's a funny memory for her first experience at professional pictures.

me, mom, and grandma k. also found time to skim through our geneology book that aunt chris made for mom. learning all sorts of personal details about that side of my family was very interesting for me. appreciating heritage is definately something i want to teach zoë someday. apparently, on that side, we are french-canadian. i knew i was french on my father's mother's side as well, so i thought that was pretty cool...grandma told me lots of little memories that i would never find if i did research. those memories are the best part of talking about families and where we come from...

as for zoë's daddy's side of the family, she got to spend lots of fun times with her uncle hayes, uncle kendy, and uncle justin, and well as her great grandma "nana", her "mumsy" (grandma gail), and her papa skip. her daddy got lots of great pictures for her scrapbook of her and uncle kendy playing together...something tells me he's one of her favorites. but she's got 6 uncles all togther, so he's got lots of competition! *laugh*
she also met her grandpa ferriol a few weeks back. there are pictures of that, but grandpa has all of them. so if you're reading this - send us some!! =) it was really great. he has the same mannerisms as her daddy, so she was right at home. they hit it off right away. he was actually really stoked about the huge grin he got the first time he spoke to her. and i think he's madly in love with his granddaughter!

anyway. so all in all, we had a great holiday. zoë was scared of wrapping paper (the ripping noise) and she loves her new things. (all things she can chew, of course!) she didn't get nearly as many clothes as i was expecting (thank god!!) but she did get a substantial amount of toys. she's set for the next year! *laugh* she got a bouncer, a walker, several small teething toys, lots and lots of books (yay!!), three "my first christmas" ornaments, a gift certificate for a real crib, another pack-n-play crib for her mumsy's house, and a few stuffed animals. oh! and a new play gym from her auntie ashleigh. so she's learning cause and effect from kicking now instead of just her hands.

as of december 20th, she weighed a whopping 14lbs 12ozs, and measured in at 23inches. i gave up for the time being on the rice cereal...she was NOT a fan. but i tried out the oatmeal for babies and she seems to like that a little better. i thinned it out more so she could pretty much drink it, and she did okay with it.

of course she was sleeping as the ball dropped to ring in 2006, but we both gave her a kiss for good luck. i hope she has a happy year filled with lots of excitement and new adventures.

happy 2006 to all of you from me and zoë!

and don't forget to click on the photoblog link to the right. it's also been updated! *woohoo*
(i'm on a roll...maybe it will be a new year resolution...)

post script

2005-12-20T08:47:00.000-08:00

ps. i'm currently updating the photo blog...click the link on the right.

three months later...

2005-12-20T08:27:00.000-08:00

wow, time flies.
zoe turned four months old on sunday and, bless her heart, broke her first tooth the same day. she chews on anything that comes within grabbing range of her flailing fists, and she drools at all times - even in her sleep! *laugh*

it's her first christmas, and she's facinated by all the different christmas trees she has already seen...something about the lights and the ornaments - she just can't get enough.

she talks to mommy and daddy all the time, and grins just as much.
she's been introduced to rice cereal, although i'm not sure if the faces she makes are because of the new texture or pure disgust...daddy thinks it's because she hasn't figured out how to close her mouth and swallow...

daddy bought her a toy for the car rides. she's never been a fan of her car seat, and she always seemed so bored sitting back there, facing away from me, and having nothing to do or look at. so he bought her a mirror that lights up and plays music. now everytime she gets in the car i get to see her beautiful grin and sometimes i'm lucky enough to hear a giggle. she carries on conversation with the cute baby in the mirror, and sometimes she'll talk to the moving lights.
of course this is all while she's chewing both fists at the same time. =)

she's about to grow out of her 3-6months size clothes, and i should be finding out later this afternoon exactly how much she weighs...she's my chunky-monkey, that's for sure!

alright. pictures pictures pictures.
(sorry it's been too long between updates...)

one month!

2005-09-20T20:04:00.000-07:00

quick update - we're in the process of packing. *eek*

she had her one month checkup yesterday. she's 10.2lbs!!! they say she's still 21 and 3/4 inches, but robert and i don't believe it. she looks like she's gotten longer since the last time they said she was that length. *shrug* who knows.
so on the breastfeeding percentile scale, she's in the 90th percentile for both her height and weight...and she's off the charts for her head size! *laugh* they refer to it as "above the 97th percentile" but we can call it like is - our baby has a big head! =) not that anyone should be surprised...she didn't have genetics on her side. mommy and daddy both have big heads.

anyway. she's lookin' good. getting chunky, and starting to smile at our silly faces.

"grandma judy" and "greatgrandma suzette" get here tomorrow, then "grandpa shane" will be here friday! *whew* so lots of meeting the family this week...

we're all headed back to the east coast, so my next update will probably be from there.

toodles to california!

oh! she's official! she's got a social security number now. *woohoo*

i'll be posting new pictures as soon as possible, so keep checking. i have them on the camera, just have to find time to put them online.

like a weed

2005-09-10T17:20:00.000-07:00

our little zoe grows bigger everyday. she's getting SO big. and i'm wondering how many more times in her life i'll say that!
she was weighed and measured two days ago, when she was exactly three weeks old, and she was 8lbs 7ozs and 22 3/4 inches long! *whew* on the general percentile scale, she's in the 46th percentile for her weight, but the 92nd percentile for her height. *eek* so maybe she gets her weight from mommy and her height from daddy? *laugh*

it's fun trying to figure out who she'll look like as she grows.
i think she's got robert's eyes and my eyelashes.
she seems to be particular like i am, but can sleep and eat like her dad! looking at her just now, i remembered she streches EXACTLY like him, it's really cute. and she does it all the time. *hehe*

so i'm really enjoying watching everything she does. watching her grow, watching her change...watching her discover her world.

i take pictures as often as i can. it seems to annoy her when i get carried away, so i don't take as many as i'd like to. *laugh* but i take enough i guess. i've posted some new ones, so have a look!

love

2005-08-29T17:39:00.000-07:00

so i've been slacking on the updating of this. who can blame me?! *heh*

actually, taking care of zoe isn't as difficult as i thought it would be. everyone always says it takes lots of work and energy, but really it just feels that way because of lack of sleep. during the day, she sleeps so often that i could get things done, i'm just so exhausted from only having two-hour increments of sleep all night...that i don't have the desire to anything but watch her sleep! *laugh* and, yes, occasionally i'll sneak in my own nap...

the truth is, i'm just too in love to spend too much time online anymore. i play with her every chance i get, and i snap pictures like it's going out of style! *heh* i know i'm gonna miss this when she's older, so i'm soaking it all up now...i'm really enjoying my moments.

so. check out the picture link again. i've posted a few more cute ones...then again, when aren't they cute?! *smile*

pictures, pictures, pictures.

2005-08-23T18:09:00.000-07:00

because i know that's what everyone wants...riiiiight? *smile*

please notice the new link to the right in the "go away" section. yep, the one called "photo blog".
anytime i write that there are new pictures, that's where you go.
get it?
got it.
good.

ps. there are new pictures. *smile*

our tiny, blue-colored, wrinkly, squishy-looking baby.

2005-08-21T14:41:00.000-07:00

*drum roll please*

zoe sofia ferriol
august 18
12:14am
7lbs 7ozs
20.5 in.
3.5 hours of labor
NO EPIDURAL!! *whew* not doing that again ANY time soon!! *laugh*

we stayed at the hospital one night longer than we wanted due to zoe having slight jaundice, but no worries. we're home now...she's adjusted well to her new world, but still loves sleeping on mommy and daddy...

she'll sleep in any position!

daddy is so in love...

the rare picture of mommy. (there's a reason it's in black and white!)

she was born with her hand in this position, and it seems to be a favorite sleeping position...

i told ya, she'll sleep in any position!

dropping belly

2005-08-16T12:37:00.000-07:00

saw the doc yesterday. he says i'm 2-3cm dialated, i've effaced more, and her head has dropped more. thanks doc. tell me something i don't know! seriously. i was hoping he'd say something along the lines of "you're in labor, why aren't you at the hospital?!" *hah* yeah, right. he gave me a slip to make an appt. for next monday, but he says he doubts he'll see me. he thinks i'll have her this week. *fingerscrossed*
hopefully these will be the last we see of my big belly...especially cause the "water weight" is most obvious now! =/ i'm hoping the next pictures i take with this camera are of a tiny, blue-colored, wrinkly, squishy-looking baby! *haha*

tapping my foot

2005-08-10T20:15:00.000-07:00

still nothing...
contractions are more frequent, and some of them hurt...but nothing consistant.

i've been trying to talk her out, but i guess she's not having it.
stubborn - just like both of her parents! *smile*

maternity leave started monday, so i'm just sitting around waiting.
anyone with ideas to pass the time - pass them this way!

close call??

2005-08-08T13:07:00.000-07:00

saw the doc thismorning.
he says i'm about 2cm dialated, i'm already effacing, and he thinks she's about 7 and 3/4 lbs now.
based on this information, he says he believes i'll have an "easy labor"...are those two words allowed to go together?!

so then i come home to relax a bit before spending my day with the car wisely (read: target!!), when suddenly...dun.dun.dun. i think i may have just lost my mucus plug. *eek*

so if the next time i write you see a picture of an itty-bitty baby...you'll know why!

new registry.

2005-08-04T17:33:00.000-07:00

everyone get excited...i have finally taken the advice of many, and registered at target.com. you can also access this register at any target store...just look me up by name.
i know there's not much on there, but i don't really need too much more besides furniture and diapers. *shrug* gift cards are always easy. *smile*
kay, get back to surfing...

go here first:
target registry

preparations.

2005-07-28T17:45:00.000-07:00

i "prepared" last night for my trip to the doc today. he warned me at the last appointment about my upcoming 'pelvic exam'...and us girls know what that means...so i was well prepared to be 'examined'. *hehe*

i was not, however, prepared for the huge rough cotton swab used to test my um...i forget. something that involves risk to zoe's respitory system...*shrug* if i have this 'thing' they tested for, i'll get some antibiotics when i go into labor. whatever!

i was not prepared to have only a paper sheet handed to me when she said "remove your clothes from the waist down".

was i prepared to hear that i was 1/2cm dialated? sure...i was hoping i was further along than that...but i'll take dialated, period. that's progress!

i was prepared to go to work after my appointment to fax some paperwork, but i was not prepared for meeting a girl who tells me "i was 4cm dialated for a month before i gave birth!"

thanks. thank you very much for bursting my "i've-made-progress-in-getting-her-out" bubble.

but i was prepared for my examination at the doc's today!! *smile*

ps. BIG thankyou to ashleigh for the awsome package i got...and to grandma keyser for the letter and gift. VERY much appreciated.

body parts

2005-07-20T21:17:00.000-07:00

she's starting to 'drop'...although i've never experienced this before, i assure you, it's happening!
all the nerves in tops of my legs go numb everytime she pushes down...

she's definately growing inches by the day. i can tell she's getting super uncomfortable - and who wouldn't folded up in that position for so long?! - so i try to coax her out all the time! *hehe* "c'mon, zoe, i know you wanna come out already...you can do it!" juuuust kidding. i do talk to her every once in a while about coming out whenever she wants, though. *smile*

last night while eating dinner, which is when she likes to do her 'daily exercising', i felt the bottom of her entire right foot. it was coolest..."hurry, robert, feel this!" we could actually feel the size of her tiny little foot...i can't wait to see her toes! *eek* i put my hand on her and pushed a little against her and she just held still pushing back for a minute. we connected, i just know it!

*beaming*

goo-goo-gah-gah

2005-07-18T16:23:00.001-07:00

so there's this couple who live in 204. they seem to be a real nice pair. he's the "general manager of a restaurant", and as far as i know, she is a stay-at-home mom. their two year old daughter is their pride and joy.
okay, now, your children being your pride and joy is not a problem at all...in fact, i'm sure i'll feel my heart swell for zoe several times a day...BUT.
have you ever met a couple whose children are their pride and joy, and they don't mind sharing all the details with you??!

i saw 'mr. restaurant' and his wife sitting in our apartment building lobby today when i came home from work...after walking home in the smoltering heat, with five pounds of baby attached to my front, the last thing i wanted was to get caught up in a 'nice' conversation with this couple. and of course my luck is that the elevator is on the fifth floor. i have to wait for it to come rescue me on the first. all the while, they're striking conversation with me about how i feel and how much longer i have left and are you okay to still be working? THEN they decide to get in the elevator with me. as if they were sitting down there waiting on me to get home to test my nerves. *sigh*

so i try to be kind and pleasant. she tells me how she was miserable being pregnant too. (which was the only piece of information i'm glad i got to hear - someone else was just as miserable as me during pregnancy!!!) so i say "speaking of which, where is your daughter?"
and that was the last thing i said. *heh* for the rest of the time spent in the lobby, the long ride in the elevator from the first floor to the second, and the dreadful walk through the hallway of the second floor where they pause at 204, trying to continue talking to me, while i'm trying to press on to 207...they take turns telling me detail for detail:
"oh she's in the apartment. we just put her down for a nap. she screams for the first ten minutes, so we leave to keep our sanity. (insert the look i must have had on my face, here.) if we don't leave, she'll talk to us, beg us to let her out of her crib...she's still in a crib. and she'll throw her toys out, then ask for them back. she throws out her dolly, her teddy bear, her this, her that (they actually listed all the toys she throws out)...and as soon as we go back in, if she's not sleeping, she'll wait a few minutes, then quietly say hello. (they mock her 'hello' here.)"

alright, you get the idea. they talk with the goo-goo-gah-gah voices like they can't get enough of their child, the idiosyncracies that she's starting to show, and all the ways she tries to get out of taking a nap. *ahhhhh!!!* who cares?! really. only they do. but they think every else does.

i know i'm being judgemental. and if i end up being this way (god help me!) with zoe, then someone can remind me of this post...but i seriously hope i just love her with all my heart. not insanely, over-the-top, loose sight of myself kind of obsession. that's a bit much. even for your own child. and that's all i have to say about that.

ha ha!!

2005-07-17T14:28:00.000-07:00

just a few quotes i came across...
thought i'd share the humor.

By far the most common craving of pregnant women is not to be pregnant. ~Phyllis Diller

If men were equally at risk from this condition - if they knew their bellies might swell as if they were suffering from end-stage cirrhosis, that they would have to go nearly a year without a stiff drink, a cigarette, or even an aspirin, that they would be subject to fainting spells and unable to fight their way onto commuter trains - then I am sure that pregnancy would be classified as a sexually transmitted disease and abortions would be no more controversial than emergency appendectomies. ~Barbara Ehrenreich

here ya go.

2005-07-14T18:57:00.000-07:00

okay, for all of you who bug me about pictures, this is your monthly dedication.
only, i'm hoping to find time to take pictures every week for the rest of the time...

the one in the full overalls outfit is for you, mom. and only cause you asked nicely. *smile*

for the record, this is 137lbs of mommy, with about 5 of those pounds being pure baby!! for some of you, this may not sound like much, but i assure you, my back has never carried this much weight!

love you all.

the woes of the 34th week.

2005-07-13T15:18:00.000-07:00

saw the doc thismorning. he measured my stomach and said "she's the perfect size". and, as usual, i heard her heartbeat. that's my favorite part. isn't it everyone's?!
got the test results back today: i'm a big-fat negatory for gestational diabetes!!! *yay!!!* he said it so nonchalantly, but seriously, i wanted to get up and dance. that's been in the back of my head since he told me i was 'borderline' and wanted me to take the three-hour test... so *whew*...one less thing to worry about.

i'm getting more and more anxious as the days slowly go by...i guess that's totally normal. it's a combination of that and the fact that i'm SO miserable now, physically, that i've been secretly thinking of ways i can make her come sooner rather than later - safely, of course. the only reason i don't want her coming right now is because i know her lungs aren't fully developed yet...*frown* unfortunately for mommy!
but the doc got me thinking about it on the way home cause he told me that at my next appointment he will be 'administering a pelvic exam to check for dialation'...greeeeaaaat. something i'm totally looking forward to, i assure you. *sarcasm* but how great would it be for me to hear that in my 36th week, she's already trying to come out?!!! he did say she was already starting to 'move into postition'...which i already knew cause my legs tingle every once in a while as the result of her pushing on my nerves while her head rests on my pelvic floor...but it's nice to hear that from doc. and that gives me hope. cause i didn't know she would be moving into position this soon. fine by me, though!

the plan is for me to start disability leave on the 7th of august. at which point i will be completely and totally bored out of my mind. there's no 'nursery' to decorate in a loft..so there's nothing of substance that will keep my mind occupied longer than a few hours at a time. meaning, feel free to call me for a chat anytime you wish! *smile* i'm sure i'll be sitting on the couch, feet proped up on the pillow which is now permanently attached to the coffee table! *laugh* i have a routine down with my 500 pillows on the couch. each has its place and purpose. how annoying! and every five minutes, when i adjust my position, i also adjust the position of the 500 pillows. being comfortable, if one can call it that, is a chore in itself these days.

starbucks coworkers are hosting a 'starbucks babyshower' for the 'starbucks baby' sometime at the end of july...rumor has it that most of them will be shopping at target, where i have yet to register...so here is my shameless plug:
babies-r-us registry

i haven't forgotten about pictures, i've actually kept it in my mind the past few days because i can feel my belly stretching so much lately...and i promise to have robert take some hopefully today...but keep in mind, he is sick as a dog right now, so i'm avoiding getting too close! *laugh* he's afraid to even breathe on me anyway since i scared him away by telling him if i get sick, i'll be seeing the doc once a week instead of once every two weeks. nothankyou!! but he's got flu-like symptoms that won't seem to go away. so, whenever he wakes up from his nap, i'll see about getting some 'cute' pictures of my 'cute' belly.

until then...

ultrasounds and glucose testing

2005-06-29T18:29:00.000-07:00

so...i changed from miltary benefits to starbucks benefits back in may.
both pay for one ultrasound...each. *smile*
so we took advantage. we got to see her again last thursday.
it's such a tease, though!
when all you want is to see her face, smell her skin, watch her smiles and laughs...you'll take what you can get! and right now, with nature being what it is, all we can do is watch a 17 inch black and white screen with blobs of white moving around.

"and there's an arm...and there's her face...and there's her heart."

it was that same day that the doc tells me my one hour glucose test results...

"you are mildly anemic...oh, and you barely passed the threshold of the glucose test, so i'm gonna want you to take the three hour test just to be sure you don't have gestational diabetes."

great. that's great news. thanks. so i'm on top of taking my prenatal vitimin EVERY SINGLE DAY now, and eating red meat has been a top priority. *blech* but whatever makes my blood thicker! that's one less thing to worry about on "d-day".
and i fasted last night and woke up super early thismorning to go sit around the lab for THREE hours!!!! and get poked for blood FOUR times!!!!! seriously. all to find out if i have GD?!! *sigh* but i did it. cause it's one less thing to worry about on d-day!

and this chica needs as few things as possible to worry about.

pregnancy=worrywort.

2005-06-20T22:07:00.000-07:00

patience?! and worries!!

2005-06-18T22:22:00.000-07:00

i feel so crazy! *weak laugh* why are crazy (irrational?) thoughts a side effect of pregnancy??! as if i don't have enough to worry about, i get to have some thoughts just because i'm pregnant?!

and how does one decipher between the two? are they both legitimate?!!

i often say to myself "it's just another crazy pregnancy thought, pay it no mind" and i repeat that over and over in my head until i'm convinced that i have nothing to worry about.

but trying to believe that all of these thoughts are only because i'm pregnant makes me worry. *heh*

30 weeks on tuesday...i can't believe i've made it this far...and of course the home-strech will go by slower than ever. doesn't it always?

good things come to those who wait.

update.

2005-06-08T12:31:00.000-07:00

i called babies-r-us about an hour ago to get my name spelled properly. she said it would take no longer than 24 hours.
there are also things listed on there that i didn't pick out, and apparently that's been a common complaint for the past few days. so they're "diligently working on the problem" and if it's not fixed in the next 48 hours, i'm supposed to call back. *shrug*
point being, if you're like amanda and you want to look at it ASAP, then it should be fixed before this time tomorrow.

thankyouverymuch.
*smile*

edit.

2005-06-07T23:11:00.000-07:00

so amanda brought it to my attention that my name is spelled incorrectly on the babies-r-us website.
there are other things that need to be corrected, too, so i'll just update again after i call them tomorrow.
sorry! *frown*

...and more pictures.

2005-06-07T15:35:00.000-07:00

two things people can stop hounding me about:

i am now registered at babies-r-us. both online and in the stores.

i have finally taken this month's pictures. but i think i'm gonna try to take pictures weekly now cause i'm FINALLY in the third trimester and that means she's gonna start growing like a weed...*frown* i'm not looking forward to this part...but it's nearly over. *whew*

alright. 'without further ado'...

pictures, pictures, pictures.

2005-05-25T16:36:00.000-07:00

i tried to post these pictures a few days ago, but the computer went kaput, and i gave up.
but here they are.
i promise i'll have robert take pictures of my belly soon.

random thoughts

2005-05-18T20:29:00.000-07:00

so everyone in the whole world who is important to me and this 'family' we've started reads this damned journal, and i've been such a slacker about keeping up on it!
please forgive me.
my mom calls all the time saying 'post pictures' and 'i wanna see the belly'...*heh*
and i always use the excuse that i've been working a lot or i'm so tired...the truth is, the first one seems true, and the second one really always is. yet i'm still on the computer all the time. it's really just that i feel like the mundaneness of everyday isn't significant enough to write. espeically not in a journal that my whole family and all my friends read!!

but i suppose it is. people keep telling me i'm gonna look back on these ten months and miss it. that, i assure you, will NOT be the case, but it would be nice to be able to read some things that were going through my head during this crazy time. so i guess that's what i'll write about.

i really only work an average of 30 hours a week at starbucks four blocks from our apartment. lately it's been a little more due to some people leaving, quitting, and getting fired, but i really don't work as much as some people. it just feels like it. because the only time i sit down is when i'm on break. my management and co-workers have been very accomodating, but i don't ask for as much as i should...only in the past few days have i been pushy about not wanting to work on the bar. i'm steadily developing carpel tunnel in my wrists, and working on the bar makes it hurt really bad. and it's the worst in the morning, which is mostly when i work. go figure. so that sucks. i'm working on a project to present to my district manager involving recycling cell phones. i hope to be able to set up a recycle 'center' in the starbucks i work in, to encourage our customers to donate. starbucks is very involved in the community, and in recycling, so as long as my DM likes the idea, i'll get to do it. i won't be getting promoted anytime soon, i've already been told. my manager tells me all the time that she can see me running my own store in the future. she'll even explain things that she does to me, just because i'm oddly interested. but she knows i'll have limited availability when i return from maternity leave. (not to mention that i'm going on maternity leave in the first place!) so she says it would be "pointless" to promote me right now. and me being the feminist that i am, i'm really angry about that answer. but thinking with a business mind, she's right. and that sucks. because i'm the girl, and i'm the one that goes on maternity leave. *pout*
and that's work. *heh*

never in my life have i remembered my dreams until now. and omigosh are they worth remembering! *laugh* only to be able to tell the story later...although i can never convey just how real it seems to me. they're that vivid. last night, for example, i dreamt that zoe was born today. and she was born 2 years old. *heh* i could see what she looked like and everything. but for some strange reason, robert and i were nowhere in the dream. i was watching it all happen from the outside looking in. like i'm watching this great party go on, and i'm not invited. and even worse - they're all calling her 'maryanne zoe'. and i was getting SO angry. i hated people calling her maryanne. finally, toward the end of my dream, i confronted my mom and asked her why everyone was calling her that. she said 'oh, don't worry. her real name is zoe, but we all call her maryanne.' and i responded 'well, her name is zoe, and that's what i'm calling her.' then i realized that i couldn't get to her. and i felt trapped and frustrated because i could not, for the life of me, figure out how to reach her. how to pick her up and hug her...*heh* the last thing i remember is being afraid to wake up because i thought she wouldn't be there, inside me. i thought i wouldn't be pregnant when i opened my eyes. and i actually woke up with my hand on my belly.

*sigh* so i only expect moms to know what those dreams feel like, but i wake up almost frustrated by them! they're just SO real. i'm terrified to wake up sometimes. robert's had to wake me up from a nightmare before. he said i was crying or moaning in my sleep or something. whatever it was, it woke him up. *shrug*

but i do wonder if she'll look the way i saw her in the dream last night. she was so beautiful. big brown eyes like robert, and long dark hair like mine...she'll have all the italian traits from the ferriols (thanks, bob!! *smile*) including the dark skin even! *fingerscrossed* and i've recently discovered my background is mostly french. so that can't be bad, right? *heh*

oh and i'm starting to worry about all sorts of details now...will i hold her too much? will i be able to breastfeed long enough? will i be able to teach her all the things i want her to learn? will she be smart? will i pick the right schools? when will she sleep the night through? will she be a momma's girl (like me) or a daddy's girl?
and while all of you veteran parents are sitting back laughing because you know exactly what i'm talking about, i don't particularly care to worry this much!! *weak laugh* it's a LOT of worrying for such a tiny girl!! (both of us tiny girls!!)

robert's just about done with dinner, and it's smellin' really good...*yumm*

no belly pictures this time, mom, but hey. at least i posted!

pictures...yay!

2005-04-24T19:54:00.000-07:00

okay, okay.
i'm finally posting pictures...
but that's all i'm posting.
dinner's ready, and robert just put a movie in!

my niece, isabelle, just turned three. that's her letting everyone know 'how many' she is. her daddy is holding her.
the cute little grinner is isabelle's younger sister, kallie.
cute, huh!

'the pregnant girl'

2005-04-17T22:10:00.000-07:00

animals can tell when a female is pregnant, can't they?? i think i heard that somewhere...and kitty is convincing me it's true.
i've been wondering why he's been more 'lovey-dovey' with me lately...when i get home from anywhere he'll follow me around the house until i kneel down and pet him. he's been sleeping right next to me pretty much every night for a while now, and tonight, out of nowhere he got in my lap and curled up for an entire movie! all of these things sound typical of a normal cat, but i assure you, kitty is not normal! *smile* he's not really into too much human contact. he usually likes playing with robert more than he likes to be pet or cuddle.
anyway, i've been thinking about it for some time now...but tonight he slept on my belly while baby kicked me for a while...and it just made me think that it could be true. i think kitty knows i'm pregnant. whatever that means in his little brain...i dunno. *heh*

i think my belly has grown a little bit more. it always feels like it's strectching anyway, but people have been staring at me. i feel like i have a big flashing red light on my belly. most of the time, people don't even make eye contact with me! *heh* customers have started making comments at work, too. i don't mind that at all. they congratulate me and ask if it's a boy or a girl...stuff like that. so i'm officially 'the pregnant girl'. i'm definately ready to be 'the momma' already! *smile*

blech

2005-04-14T00:49:00.000-07:00

i feel like i'm letting someone down by not posting...*smile* just because this is the first blog where so many people read it to keep up with such a huge part of my life. and it's the first blog that any family knows about, so that adds pressure, too. *hehe*
i just feel like there's nothing interesting to post about.

my belly is growing bigger by the day, but the only reason i know it is because i feel the pulling of the tendon and muscles. and it's not the most comfortable thing in the world! but she's kicking so much more now...mostly while i'm trying to sleep and right after i eat. speak of the devil...as if she can read the screen, she just kicked me really hard! *laugh* i put my hand on her, and she kicked me a few more times...robert still isn't sure that he's felt her. i think it hurts his feelings a little...cause i'll lay his hand there for a while and tell him each time she kicks, and he isn't sure that he can feel it. i'm sure he'll get his share of feeling when she's bigger...

i just ended an 8 hour shift - closing! i didn't get out until 11:45pm and i'm getting used to being in bed by 11pm. *frown* and poor robert came to get me because i walk four blocks to work...but walking those four blocks at almost midnight isn't the smartest idea for this pregant chica. so he's trying to sleep while i'm trying to wind down - hacking away on the computer. oh the troubles of shift work.

i guess my surprise date tomorrow will make up for all these nights! *smile* he won't have time to read this until after the date, so i can say...i snagged a free movie pass from work for the theatre in the same mall that i work in...it's a pass for two to a sneak preview of the new movie with ashton kutcher and amanda peet - 'a lot like love'. i know it's a chick flick, but i figured a) it's free. and b) we should get as much dating in as possible right now before it becomes near impossible to go somewhere without a baby! right?! so i think he can deal with a chick flick...*laugh*

we had stephen, haley, isabelle, and kallie over this past sunday night for dinner and a movie. ('finding neverland' is really good)...for those of you who don't know, that's my brother, sister-in-law, and two nieces, respectively. anyway, i took a few cute pictures of the girls when they fell asleep, so i'll post those next time. maybe tomorrow while i'm home all alone.
also got some cute ones of kitty playing in the laundry basket. is that only cute to me? i should have snapped some of kitty and kallie getting aquainted - now that was cute! *laugh* i dunno if haley much liked it though...she's not a fan of kitty.

alright. my typing is keeping robert up and it's nearly 1am. gotta get to bed.

love to all.

we had the ultrasound today!

2005-04-07T19:48:00.000-07:00

so the ultrasound doc wasn't the nicest of the bunch...i think she's just been doing this for far too long to feel as much emotion as we feel. *shrug* she didn't care too much.

anyway, before she could even start the process of taking weird-looking pictures, she made me partially relieve my bladder - twice! which, lemme tell you, isn't the funnest thing in the world when you're told to drink 32 ounces of water in an hour and not use the restroom...*sigh*
then she proceeded to poke and prod me for a while. i couldn't see the screen while she took tons of pictures for the doctor, but robert was in a daze. he got to see the whole time...
finally she turned the screen towards me and showed us lots of positions and pictures...

another doctor came in after that to have a look for herself, and she proclaimed with confidence that we were having a boy. which of course excited the both of us...and confused us too - the first doctor told us we had a 99% chance of having a girl. ???

so the two doctors brought a third one in, they did some more poking, and all three of them almost simultaneously determined it was, in fact, a girl.

we're having a baby girl!!!! *grin*

she is upside down, which i've been told is the position she's supposed to be in? *shrug*
she is 'very active' which is also a good thing...i'm sure part of the reason was because she was being poked! (duh)
mom told me i was active too, and i didn't much like being poked...what baby does?
almost immediately after the screen was turned towards me, she looked at the wand (at the screen) with her mouth wide open...it was the coolest thing. we saw her little feet moving around, and her healthy stomach, legs, arms, and big 'ol head.
she's in good shape - very healthy.
and that's the best, and most important news.

after robert got off of work, we went to target...i've been saying for a while now that as soon as found out what it was, i wanted to be the first to buy something for her. so we picked out her first blanket and her first doll. she has a green with blue trim blanket, and a soft cream-colored rabbit doll. the hands and feet are flat and plastic (for teething) and it also rattles...
neither of us are big on pink (though i admit i'm more adiment about not having pink than he is...) so we were thinking green for the bedding. he's not a fan of the 'baby yellow' (as he calls it)...so green is the compromise. *smile* we're silly.

we're havin' a girl, we're havin' a girl...

new doctor, new ideas.

2005-03-30T13:43:00.000-08:00

i had a checkup on monday...
i changed doctors after my last checkup when doc leventis wouldn't give me the time of day after finding out i didn't want to take certain tests that she thinks i should take.
so anyway. i was switched to a nurse practitioner. which to me translates very close to midwife, making me more comfortable.
she reminds me of grandma benedetto, maybe 10 or 20 years younger. she's very understanding, listens well, and is patient with all of my millions of questions.
she discussed the tests that i didn't want to take, and understood and accepted my reasons for not wanting to take them.
i told her my confusion about my due date and what day i change weeks...we finally came to the definate conclusion that i am now 19 weeks and i change weeks on tuesdays. which makes more sense to me.
she let me listen to the heartbeat for a while, and told me it was in the '140s'. she says it fine that the heart rate changes...she compared it to adults walking up stairs - increasing (or decreasing) the heart rate. so i'm not worried about that anymore.

the little pea keeps kicking me. it's becoming a more regular thing now that he's figured out how to roll around...the first time i felt him was because i was laying on him. *hehe* i couldn't get comfortable for the life of me one night, so i tried laying on my stomach. he wasn't having it. *laugh* i got kicked quite a few times until i realized what it was, and rolled back over. seems like he's stubborn like both of his parents! *smile*

robert didn't get the promotion he'd been offered three weeks ago because he 'hasn't worked for the company for six months'...however, all the managers that have contact with him are pulling for the rule to be overlooked. they're having a meeting today to outline how he will 'lead' the department without technically being promoted...i told him to pull for a substantial raise at his 90-day trial period review. this way, it doesn't really matter what his position is called - he'll be running his department and have gotten the raise he deserves. *shrug* we'll see how it all works out.

i'm in the same boat, with one minor difference - i'm the one carrying the child, and the one who will be on maternity leave for three months come august. my manager told me that i won't be promoted to shift supervisor until well after i return from leave because i 'won't have open availability'...i've found out since then that the starbucks regulation is i have to have 32 hours of availability (the amount of hours a shift supervisor is guaranteed to work), but for my store, that involves being available for 8 hour shifts. that would require lots of breast pumping for milk. my goal is to breastfeed at least a full year. even while working. am i setting my sights too high?

robert is at the raw beginning of a business idea he has...the guy he works for in his spare time (writing military resumes) is a self-starter much like robert, and has given advice on how to get this idea off the ground. once robert has his ideas well drawn out on paper, he's even going to schedule a meeting with this guy. it's an internet business, which involves lots of time building the site on the computer...but if it takes off, robert has set his sights on working from home. (read: stay-at-home dad!) *grin* and i'll be working to keep our family benefits. if by then, i've been able to start taking photographs more regularly, it would really cool to be able to sell them at the swap meets like i've been wanting to do. robert and i have talked at length about how to do that...

so we have goals...rough so far, but goals none-the-less. and very achievable! we just have to be patient and dilligent. *heh*

picture, yay!

2005-03-26T20:39:00.000-08:00

*gasp*
can you believe it?
exactly one month and one day later, i took another picture of my growing belly.

the process to get the picture online is a tedious one, and i ended up having to pull up the first picture that i took...so i had the pleasure of seeing both belly pics side-by-side...omigod what a huge difference!
i'm almost convinced that it's a boy just because it appears that i'm carrying all on the front.
is this wives tale true? i've heard some pretty crazy ones.

really, i just want to know what it is. i hate calling it "it". i think 'it's' nickname will be pea, since that's what i've been refering to 'it' as.
*laugh* anyway...april 7th is just around the corner...and i get to hear the heartbeat again on monday. *smile*
sorry i can't transmit sound by websites...

will you settle for this picture? ;)

stuff.

2005-03-25T11:38:00.000-08:00

is it possible to say 'the dentist visit went well' ??? *laugh* but it did...for a dentist. he gave me lots and lots of numbing medicine, making my mouth feel like it was ten times the size it really was. i could feel pressure, and i felt the top tooth literally 'pop' out. but other than that, it went much better than i was thinking it would.
it's friday and i had them removed on tuesday, so i'm feeling much better. the area is still sore and i haven't mustered up the courage to feel the area with my tongue yet (*eww*!!) but i've been eating solid foods on the opposite side of my mouth since wednesday night.

yesterday i was upset about our shower being completely disugusting because it stopped draining, and i thought when someone knocked on the door that it was our maintenance guy, jun, stopping by to fix it. nope. it was UPS delivering a package from momma! *smile* and how i so love packages. i got two pregnancy books, and two really cute pregnancy shirts. i'm going to wear one today on my venture to the library. i'll take pictures in them, kay? thank you momma.
ps. the shower is now fixed (and cleaned!!) thanks to my personal handiman, robert. *hehe*

i haven't forgotten about pictures, it's just that robert and i have been working off schedules. but i have today off, and he should be home around 5pm, so i'll make myself a note to have them taken tonight. does this please everyone?? *smile*

and isabelle's birthday is coming up!! can anyone believe that she will be 3 already?! i've been told that the 23rd is her tentative birthday party day...so i've already requested that day off. of course there will be lots of picture taking, so not only will haley send some out, i'm sure, but i'll post some here as well...

is it possible that i think i'm a week farther along than i've been thinking all along?? i went back to the day that i had my first appointment when they told me i was 8 weeks...then my doc said i was to change weeks on sundays. so i counted from that, and i should be 18 weeks when i thought i was 17 weeks. now i don't know what to do...i guess i'll find out for sure at the next ultrasound on the 7th. they'll measure the pea, won't they? i figured it's not too important anyway...nobody really seems to know my true due date anyway. i just tell people "the end of august"...*heh* i'm more concerned with what we're gonna do after the day it's born! *smile*
but if the pea is in the 18th week, it can now yawn, swallow, suck, hiccup, and make faces. weird!

hope everyone's having a great day.

exhaustion...

2005-03-22T16:16:00.000-08:00

i know i've been such the slacker for not updating...everyone is yelling at me for it! *smile* that's alright cause it lets me know that people are actually reading my nonsense.

i'm getting my wisdom teeth pulled. no more wisdom for me. =) *sigh* yep, i finally mustered up the cajones to call a dentist. mom said (and i agreed) that i should do it now while it's free. plus i really can't go five more months of being pregnant and dealing with wisdom teeth issues. i haven't been able to chew properly, i've been getting pretty regular headaches, and when i wake up in the morning, i can hardly clench my jaw from my teeth moving and adjusting for more space...

so i went yesterday to this really great (so far!) dentist...dr. thomas. it's a two second walk from my house...right around the corner literally. anyway, they took four x-rays of my two wisdom teeth that haven't come through yet. dr. thomas showed me my teeth, and pointed out - to my surprise! - how small these two teeth are. he says the top one should 'pop out like a splinter' because apparently top ones come out much easier than bottom ones...and the bottom one, because it's already half way through my gums, won't be difficult at all...and they're both pointing straight (not towards the other teeth) which apparently also makes this process easier.
*eek* so he's giving me a shot of lidocaine (sp?) with some drug that starts with an 'e'...and his secratary contacted my OB who okay'd the medication...so it must be safer than i thought. i'm going to research it quickly before i go, but i'm feeling more comfortable with it...doc says the only side effect (most commonly found in pregnant women, too!) is a faster heartbeat.
i was able to ask a million questions (how typical of me) and the doc was kind enough to be patient with me. he answered everything thoroughly and to my standards...*heh* so far i'm pleased. as pleased as i could be with a dentist, that is.
anyway, they called and said it would have to be delayed an hour because he's running behind, so i get to delay my fears that much longer! ohjoy.
robert will be home in time to go with me!! so he's gonna 'rescue' me from this horrifying experience as soon as he can...*laugh* i'm imagining i won't be up to eating much, so my guess is he'll be making me some soup like he did with the first migrane i got from all of this...
only a few more hours and this will all be over...

i promise i will post updated belly pics as soon as i remember to ask robert to take them.
also, we find out the sex on april 7th, so look for an update around that date, too!!!
maybe i can find a place that will scan the ultrasound pics...any suggestions?
boys' names suggestions are gladly welcomed as well. we have enough girls names to argue over! *haha*

emotions running high.

2005-03-09T16:26:00.000-08:00

i have no idea what's wrong with me today...
*hah* just kidding. i know exactly what's wrong. i'm pregnant. surprise. *laugh*
i've watched fear factor, dr. phil, and now i'm on "the worlds biggest baby shower" hosted by oprah. and i swear in a matter of the two 1/2 hours it took to get through those shows, i've almost cried about every five minutes.
and this baby shower thing by oprah...ah. i keep pausing to watch clips of all these (640) pregnant moms at ft. campbell, kentucky (army) talking about missing their husbands...one lady said her husband won't be back from iraq in time to be there for the birth.
but they're getting spoiled rotten. it's one of oprah's shows where all she does for the entire show is give away stuff. she's got celebrity moms on the show giving away their favorite baby gadget(s)...

*sigh* anyway...so i'm off today and tomorrow, and i'm going to get maternity pants tomorrow! *yay*

i need as many tissues now, as i will need diapers in a few months! *laugh*

update:
okay. i finally cried. i bawled, really. *heh* martina mcbride came out and sang "in my daughter's eyes" live...and i couldn't help it...momma 'gave' that song to me when it first came out...so that made it worse!
i love you momma.

Everything becomes a little clearer
I realize what life is all about
It's hangin' on when your heart
has had enough
It's giving more when you feel like giving up
I've seen the light
It's in my daugter's eyes

In my daughter's eyes I can see the future
A reflection of who I am and what will be
Though she'll grow and someday leave
Maybe raise a family

update again:
so then kenny chesney came out and sang "there goes my life"...*laugh* some of you don't know that i grew up listening to this kind of tear-jerking music...my momma still loves it. *heh* so not only are the lyrics worthy of my sitting on the bed bawling again, but so is thinking about momma going "oh! listen to this one, i know you're gonna love it!"

She hugged them both and
headed off to the West Coast.
And he cried,
There goes my life.
There goes my future, my everything.
I love you.
Baby good-bye.

is time flying?

2005-03-06T12:54:00.000-08:00

sometimes it feels like yesterday that i peed on the stick...still lived with stephen and haley, neither of us had jobs! but sometimes it feels like it will be forever until august...*sigh*

either way, i'm 15 weeks today. *woohoo*

i have my next checkup on tuesday where i'll be seen for the baby and for cervical dysplasia. they obviously can't treat it or do anything about it, but i guess they're gonna try to figure out how bad it is. *shrug* i'm not really sure how they're gonna do that since that can't take samples of my cervix...anyone know?
i also get to schedule my next/last? ultrasound on tuesday...the one that will *hopefully* detect the sex of the baby!! *eek* they won't do it until i'm 20-22 weeks along, and won't schedule it until i'm 15-16 weeks. if we find out, i'm going out that day and buying the first thing for 'it'. mom already gave me the babycake, but i'll buy the first piece of clothing or something. the first blanket, maybe.

i always get really excited about the checkups now...the stupid pap is done, so i know all i have to do is answer questions, let them press on my stomach, and then i get to hear the heartbeat. *smile* i look forward to that for a month at a time now...i wish i had my own gadget to hear it whenever i wanted...i always try to feel it, but it just doesn't work out that way. *heh*

anyway...about 25 more weeks left...and counting!

blech

2005-03-03T14:31:00.000-08:00

i was at work thismorning for all of about 30 minutes before they sent me home.
i sound like i'm talking with my nose plugged...my eyes have been watering since i woke up, i must've sneezed 20 times already today, and i feel like itching my nose right off my face! *pout*
i don't know if it was all the moving and cleaning yesterday, or whatever it was that haley and the girls had...

robert surfs all the time scouring for free stuff for our apartment...how 'bout our luck when he found a landlord giving away an apartment full of furniture because the tenant walked out on paying the rent?!! it didn't smell too lovely (cause the landlord had to hold it for 30 days), but after robert did some extreme dusting and febreezing, we have an echo-free, organized, mis-matching, FREE house! *laugh*
and my favorite - we don't have to sleep on the same piece of furniture that we sit on and eat on...*smile* the drafting table is the make-shift desk, and i think robert's favorite piece. we don't have to keep the laptop in our lap anymore.

here's what our 'new' living room looks like now:

"This kid is running the show--when I eat, when I sleep. I'm just the starship Enterprise."--Lisa Wilkinson, Chicago, IL

2005-02-28T12:36:00.000-08:00

Your Baby
Make a fist--that's how big your baby is now. At week 14, he weighs close to an ounce and measures between three and four inches from top to bottom. Like you, he can make a fist, too, with fingers that have a unique set of prints; an epidermal layer in his skin shows genetically determined ridges on the tips and palms. Keep drinking those glasses of skim milk, because in the next eight weeks the bones throughout his body will harden as calcium gets deposited. Your son's neck is now getting longer too, which means his chin doesn't have to rest on his chest anymore.

Your Body
The nausea may finally be abating, only to be replaced by yet another gripe, abdominal aches. That's because your uterus is growing, and the surrounding ligaments are stretching right along with it.

###############################

...so that's why i'm getting so big! *smile* well at least i'll start feeling him move soon...soon after that we'll find out the sex...*eek!* with each week that passes i get more and more excited!
i've been feeling the streching for quite some time now, however...i have to hold the weight sometimes while i'm working...i guess being on my feet all day isn't much help for comfort levels. *frown*

grandma keyser sent me a check for my birthday, and she's really particular about spending it on yourself and not bills...so i finally get to get some clothes that fit me. i think i'm gonna check out that old navy with maternity clothes...if not i'll just order it online. they have lowrise maternity pants! *yay for me* i can still feel cute even though i have pimples all over me and i'm starting to walk funny 'cause my back is always killing me...*frown* robert swears i'm still cute, though...he makes everything all better sometimes. *smile*

numb to reality.

2005-02-26T23:23:00.000-08:00

we got our first day off together since we've both been working...so we took advantage of it!

balboa park is just up the road, and it's one of the prettiest parks i've ever been to. i'm so glad that it's so close to us. so we went and had lunch, took some pictures, walked around for a while, and had some really great conversation.

it felt the same way i felt when we used to go on trips to myrtle beach and charleston...i really enjoyed it...*laugh* okay, i'll stop gushing. here's two pictures we took while we were 'popping a squat' on one of the lawns.

my first picture!

2005-02-25T23:39:00.000-08:00

promise fulfilled. *smile*
my first 'belly picture'...
at almost 14 weeks.

late night...

2005-02-25T02:29:00.000-08:00

working 3pm to 11:30pm sucks!!
i was really getting used to the am scheduling...(surprise, surprise, huh?)
it just fits better since robert has his 9 to 5 now. we can be home at the same time and relax together...*shrug* it's just a small 'luxury' i guess...

but i'm off for the next two days! *grin*
and i've been dreading sleep lately cause i've been having a hard time getting more than two hours at a time...so i stayed up creating this blog.

not too shabby, eh?
robert has the picture program set up for his website, so once i get him to change that, i'll start posting pictures...

i know momma would *love* to see the pictures i have of my nieces (as would haley, i'm sure) so i'll post some of those, too.

this gives me my excuse to start taking pictures of my belly...*smile* i promise i will...i'll try to remember to get robert to take some either friday night or saturday...i can't take them of myself. i already tried. *laugh*

anyway...welcome i guess. hope this idea works out like i'm hoping it will...

it's me...i'm new...

2005-02-25T00:54:00.000-08:00

wow...
this is way better than my other blog...
choices, choices, choices...

urbanmomma

but i have pictures!

birthday party drama

the new ads.

we're still alive...

home

slow down on the growing up!

work, school, sleep, repeat.

another 2 months...

new magazine

happy 2006!

post script

three months later...

one month!

like a weed

love

pictures, pictures, pictures.

our tiny, blue-colored, wrinkly, squishy-looking baby.

dropping belly

*tapping my foot*

close call??

new registry.

preparations.

body parts

goo-goo-gah-gah

ha ha!!

here ya go.

the woes of the 34th week.

ultrasounds and glucose testing

patience?! and worries!!

update.

edit.

...and more pictures.

pictures, pictures, pictures.

random thoughts

pictures...yay!

'the pregnant girl'

*blech*

we had the ultrasound today!

new doctor, new ideas.

picture, yay!

stuff.

exhaustion...

emotions running high.

is time flying?

*blech*

"This kid is running the show--when I eat, when I sleep. I'm just the starship Enterprise."--Lisa Wilkinson, Chicago, IL

numb to reality.

my first picture!

late night...

it's me...i'm new...

tapping my foot

blech

blech